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Monday, November 3, 2008

??????????????

I feel as if my heart is empty & numb...... even when tried reading the BIBLE... it's only help for the moment... pls HELP!!!

2 comments:

Phyu said...

it happened to me before too. many times in fact. i remember, whenever it happened, it was because i was far from God. i was far from living by faith. that is, i stopped living by faith. i was living by my own means. i was surviving well without God. really, i had "everything i need." money, friends, you know, the worldly things, etc. so naturally, i stopped depending on God. big trouble.

however, soon, i find the same emptiness you're talking about. i really understand this emptiness. it's unbearable. i really don't want to go back to it again and again. but before i knew it, it has gotten a hold of me. i drifted too far from the shore. it's when i let my guard down for even a while that i was caught.

that's why i shared on saturday's prayer meeting, it's not easy being a believer. very tiring. every day is a struggle against my flesh, to draw near God. "the spirit is indeed willing, but the flesh is weak."

i don't know if it's the case for you. but for me, i have to make an effort every day, to meditate on His word. even just "snacking." even just for 5 sec, i beat myself to do think about God and not to forget i am a christian. otherwise, phew~~~~ i get sucked into the world. lol..

that's why i have to rush to prayer meeting... that's why i cannot be late for service... it's to save myself. it's not because i am strong that i can come to church the way i do. everybody always say, "wow phyu, so early, good job. lain mar lai tar." lol.. but they don't know that it's because i really cannot do otherwise. i will die! that's why i am envious of some of you, who don't need to do that to stay focus on God. i, on the other hand, am really weak. i need to be in God's presence at least at that time. otherwise, i really am a gone case. sorry if it's scary but that's my spiritual battle.

i don't know how else to help you. i will pray for you tonight. i mean it whenever i say "i will pray for you." i hope you stay strong. even 5 sec a day is good. just hang on to God like an annoying gum on the shoe. haha... you know, it's easier to fight the battle when we fight it together. *hint*

Anonymous said...

thanks PHYU for ur reply. i really like this phrase "just hang on to God like an annoying gum on the shoe." i think that's what i need to do n more often. LOL. i ll b one annoying child. everyday is spiritual warfare.and i thank GOD for making me feel the way i was feeling (not that i like to feel this way. i hate this feeling)jst a spirutal awaking call for me before i drifted too far. i feel much better today thanks for ur prayer. this morning before even opening my eyes..i had a lil chat wit GOD. and i felt GOOD!better yet JOY!thx!!!